I’m Going to be a Nurse!(?)

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It’s been a while since I’ve updated this blog! I tend to forget that it exists until someone asks me, “So do you write in your blog anymore?” “Oh yeah!” I usually retort, “I forgot about that thing!” So here I am, NOT forgetting about this thing.

So what have I been doing with my life recently?  Well, it just so happens that I’m a nursing student now!  I started Nursing school at the beginning of September and have been busy with that since!  On top of that, I’ve also been volunteering with St. John’s Ambulance to get my practicum hours, and I’ve been seeking out Christian Communities to fellowship with.  I finally feel like I’m adjusting to it all.  I still haven’t found a specific Christian Community, but I’m just trying a bunch out before I stick to one.

As for the Nursing side of things, it’s going alright.  The classes aren’t terrible, but they’re not exactly thrilling either.  I suppose that’s what’s expected from the first year.  Part of me, however, still isn’t sure I want to be a nurse.

First off, Nursing was not my #1 choice when I signed up for school.  I really wanted to get into Medical Imaging, but my grades wouldn’t allow it, so I signed up for Nursing as an alternative.  I found out I was on the wait list around June, and started planning a different future with the belief that I was not going to get into Nursing.  By the end of July/beginning of August, I was about settled with the idea that I’d move to Vernon and live with my friend for the year.  I was really excited!  Then around the 2nd week of August I got a letter in the mail.  “You’ve been accepted into the Nursing Program!” it said,  “Please respond to this letter within 10 days or your acceptance will be denied.”  A wave of emotions hit me.  “Do I accept it?  Is this what I actually want?  Is this what God wants?  Why would He open this window of opportunity if I wasn’t supposed to say yes?”  After pondering the question for a few days, and wrestling with my emotions, I decided to say yes.  It was slightly heartbreaking telling my friend that I wasn’t going to live with her in BC, but she understood.  Surely God wouldn’t have opened this door for me if I wasn’t supposed to take it…right?

When I was deciding if I was going to be a nurse, everyone commented, “You’d be such a great nurse, Kelsey.”  After the decision was made, the phrase morphed into, “You’re going to be such a great nurse, Kelsey!”  Yet I can’t help but self-doubt.  Sometimes I feel like I’m more interested in Biology than I am taking care of patients, or I worry that I won’t be able to handle the “dirty jobs” associated with Nursing.  At times I wonder if my body will be able to withstand the shift work or I become scared that I won’t have the social skills to deal with patients.  And because I’m so afraid I’m not supposed to be a Nurse, I’m afraid that I wasting a lot of money on tuition.  I will be honest, I am filled with a lot of fear.  Sometimes the fear becomes so overwhelming it makes me cry; and I do not cry easily.

I am unsure if I am suited to be a Nurse.  Perhaps God gave me this opportunity so it would be easier for me to transfer to another program.  Or maybe once I begin my practicum in the long term care facility next semester, I will start to enjoy Nursing more.  Maybe God wants me to be a Nurse so that I can use it on the mission field.  It’s not clear what God has planned for me, and I’m not really sure how to respond to my feelings.  The only thing I can think to do is talk to God about it.  But it occurred to me today that I need to share my thoughts and struggles more often, and ask for help when I need it.  Well guys, this is me opening up and saying I need help.  I need prayer, more than anything, (but advice wouldn’t hurt either).  Please pray that God would reveal what He wants for me, lead me in the right direction, and take away my fear.

Thank you and God bless

Moldova – Day 14 (June 21, 2014)

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-Last day in Moldova and flight home-

We got up at 3am last night so we could make it for our flight at 5:30am.  On the first flight I was miraculously able to sleep for part of it!  Normally, I just can’t seem to sleep on airplanes, but this time I could lay down because the seat next to me was open!  Slava Domnul!  :)

When Jolayne and I got to Vienna, we spent some time sleeping on the benches since we had a long layover.  And just a side note, Vienna airport sucks.  Mostly because it has a very strange layout, and is hard to navigate.

This 9 hour flight to Canada was not nearly as terrible as the first 9 hour flight to Europe.  I watched a few movies, and had an easier time relaxing (probably because I was drugged up haha).

I don’t even remember that last flight from Toronto to Saskatoon.  Partially this is because I didn’t write anything down after the 9 hour flight, but also because I was just so done with travelling.  I vaguely remember laying on the floor of the Toronto airport.  And then I remember arriving in Saskatoon.  The rest is a blur.

Arrival at Saskatoon airport with my Mom

Mom and Dad picked me up from Saskatoon airport.  Greeted with roses! How nice!

Sick and exhausted, I went to bed as soon as possible.  I’m pretty sure my ears didn’t unplug for at least a week after getting back to Saskatoon!  That’s what colds will do to you I guess!  I was just happy to be back on Saskatchewan soil!

 

*Overview of trip to come*

Moldova – Day 13 (June 20, 2014)

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-Debriefing/Fun day-

Last night was a difficult one.  I had a really hard time trying to fall asleep because my stomach hurt so much.  Then I threw up, and I finally could sleep!  Sometimes you just need to get it out of your system!

I woke up in the morning with a nasty cold, which was not a pleasant turn of events.  Debriefing today was hard, because I felt so miserable.  But I wasn’t going to let that get in the way of spending a fun last day with my team members!

We went to the food market, an art show, the Orthodox church, and the mall.  It was really fun exploring downtown Chisinau.  The city culture in Moldova is so much different than the country culture.  But I suppose that’s the same anywhere you go!

Food market

Food market

Orthodox church in Chisinau

Orthodox church in Chisinau

Located in the mall

Located in the mall

I saw this sign and laughed out of shock.  They had all sorts of items you could order with cannabis!  I guess it’s legal in Moldova!

Moldova – Day 12 (June 19, 2014)

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Travelling day!  Poor Rachel was up all night sick.  She seemed so miserable this morning.  And of course she sick on the day we are travelling!  Poor girl.

We took two buses back to Chisinau.  Both buses were actually quite comfortable, although my bladder almost exploded for three hours on the second bus.  Despite the pain, I had some really good chats with Laura and Hannah on the way back.  Unfortunately for me, I started developing cold symptoms while we were travelling.  The sickness!  Nooo!!

After we got back to Chisinau, a few of us went to Tony’s house for pizza.  It was really fun getting to know his family!  But my sickness was progressivly getting worse, and the cheese on the pizza really didn’t help, (Since I can’t really handle my dairy all that well). “I WILL NOT GET SICK” I tried to tell myself.  After getting back to the base, I immediately went to bed in order to combat the grossness.

Moldova – Day 11 (June 18, 2014)

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Today began well with an encouraging read from Proverbs after waking up with a surprising amount of energy.   It must have been all that gardening that exhausted me and gave me a better sleep.😉  One thing that this trip has made me appreciate is mornings.  It feels nice to routinely wake up at 8 and go to bed at 10:30.  The day feels full and long; not like the morning was wasted!

The activity for this morning was distributing literature.  Our group confronted many Orthodox believers who refused to take a Bible, while the other group seemed to have better luck getting rid of their Bibles.  But in the end, we got rid of everything! Hallelujah!

Christy and Rachel displaying some material

Christy (our translator) and Rachel displaying some material

Our afternoon was mostly spent relaxing, which was kind of nice, but I kind of wished we could have done something more.  In the evening we did another kids program, and ended the day with a late supper.  At supper we had some canned fish, and there was this one can of smoked fish from Latvia that was SO GOOD.  And that’s saying something, because I’ve never enjoyed canned fish before.

Group of kids from Drochia village

Group of kids from Drochia village